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  • The Weekend

    The carefree days of summer vacation are over. When my kids went back to school, they instantly began looking forward to the weekend. “How many more days until the weekend?” This sparked a serious debate regarding the days of the week. I feel strongly that Sunday is the first day of the week. Everyone else thinks that because Sunday is part of the weekend, Monday is the first day of the week. Also, why is it called a weekend? It’s not like time stops at the weekend. Maybe we need a more optimistic approach to our calendar terminology. We use the weekend to recover from the past week. We should spend the weekend preparing for a fantastic week ahead. Maybe it should be called a weekcommence.

  • Uncle Boozie with more on hats

    Weeeeell, hey. It’s everybody’s favorite uncle. That’s right. It’s me, Uncle Boozie.

    You know, a hat can be a really important part of an outfit. A hat can really tie everything together. A hat is useful too. You could use it, if there was something small that you needed to carry. You could take off your hat and put stuff in the hat. I don’t know what it would be. Let’s say that you took everything out of your pockets. You could put it all into your hat. It would fit. I don’t know why you would do that. But you could put everything from your pockets into your hat and carry it, if you wanted to. Hats are good.

    A good hat is hard to find.

  • Crash

    My website crashed. I updated an application related to PayPal on my web store. I’m not pointing fingers because I honestly have no idea what happened. I discovered the crash when I tried to schedule today’s Daily Dispatch. You can read it tomorrow because I need to drop everything and solve this problem. I was able to utilize the automatic backup feature that was automatically set up with my web host. I automatically reverted to yesterday. Everything works perfectly. It was like the disaster had never happened. I think there is a metaphor here. The problem is that when I reverted to yesterday, today’s post didn’t happen and now it is tomorrow. I need to repost yesterday’s post, schedule today’s post to go out tomorrow. and make sure that you read this post today. This isn’t remotely confusing. Wait, I just heard a garbage truck. That means that it’s Thursday. I need to go and take the garbage out.

  • Regular is NOT Keeping a Banjo in the Bathroom

    Wednesday Words

    Here is another verse of “Not as Regular.” I think this one is pretty self-explanatory. Make sure you are always prepared because you never know when the muse will show up.

    I keep a banjo in the bathroom
    Just in case
    I gotta be prepared
    If inspiration strikes
    Not as regular as I used to be
    Not as regular as I used to be
    Not as regular as I used to be
  • Dolly is Out

    “Hey, Pops, Dolly Parton is no longer my favorite songwriter.”

    “OK, then who is your favorite songwriter?”

    “I don’t know who it is right now but pretty soon my favorite songwriter will be me. I just need to write some songs.”

  • The Red Eye Arrangement

    This is my favorite part of the recording process. A raw song is so ripe with potential. The barebones guitar track could become anything. I have big plans for this song that include drums, dirty guitar, mandolin, lap steel, banjo, and maybe some tuba.

    Check out the pure potential of this song on YouTube.

  • Geriatric Cat

    Our cat is old. She’s been roaming our house for almost 18 years. At this stage in her life, she spends a lot of time sleeping in our bed. It’s fine, she has earned this rest. The problem is that the bed is upstairs and her food is downstairs. The stairs have become difficult for her. She doesn’t have a problem coming down when she is hungry but she isn’t motivated enough to go back up on her own. She sits at the bottom of the steps and meows incessantly. She only stops when she makes me so crazy that I break down and carry her up the stairs. “Her Majesty” has me well trained. The real problem is that her litter box is two flights down to the basement. That’s not nearly as motivating as food. Hannah suggested that we should start a business manufacturing cat-sized stair lifts. I can’t get mad because someday I will be so old that I spend all day in bed and accidentally poop on the floor.

  • The Continuing Saga of the Piano Lessons

    I’ve been giving my son piano lessons.

    We had just finished his most recent lesson and he said, “Don’t take this the wrong way… I like you lots but I don’t really like the piano teacher version of you.”

    “Really? Why is that?”

    “I don’t know…. Who is that weird kid that was really good at piano?”

    “Nice change of subject but I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

    “You know, he was really good at piano and his name was something about a wolf?”

    “Do you mean Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart?”

    “Yeah, that’s him. He is so weird… You can go now. I’ll be done soon.”

  • Uncle Boozie on hats

    Weeeeell, hey. It’s everybody’s favorite uncle. That’s right. It’s me, Uncle Boozie.

    I wanted to talk to you today about the importance of a hat. If it is a sunny day and you put a hat on your head, it will protect your head from the powerful rays of the sun. A hat can prevent you from getting your head burnt. The sun has very powerful rays. A hat is good protection. If that old powerful sun goes behind a cloud and it starts to rain, the hat can also protect your head from the rain. The head is an important part of the body and it’s nice that a hat can do so much. It can keep you dry… well, it can keep some of the rain off… it really depends on how hard it is raining. A hat is wonderful protection in lots of different weather. Although if the wind picks up, that could be a problem. If it gets too windy, the hat could blow away and be gone forever. True story, it happened to me. A good hat is hard to find.

  • The Little Things

    If you have come out to a show while wearing one of my shirts, thank you. If you threw your change into my tip jar, thank you. If you tune-in to share a cup of coffee with me in the morning, thank you. If you have ever sent a song request, musical recommendation, or word of encouragement, thank you. All of the little things are important. If you have showed up and been part of the community, thank you. If you have reminded me that life can be good and we are making a difference, thank you.  

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