Ever since the beginning of time There’s been songs written about heartache And man’s forever quest to get over it This song ain’t much different It includes all the same cliches Difference is, it’s about the first original heartache At the start of time, world was made Man was there but he got lonely, so Woman was made and it all went downhill from there Somewhere down the road woman got Restless and tired of his stink, she Decided she’d be better off without that bum With the sands of time, The hourglass empties Desert sure is dry You can’t get water From a stone Man wasn’t meant to be alone Man was sad and this was a new feeling Never felt before, his Eyes swelled up and a spray came forth Sand poured from his eyes, he Beat his chest and carried on Yeah, that’s right, I said sand poured from his eyes Like I said this was all brand new Not without a few bugs to work out, and Back then sand was the way of expressing sadness So man set out across the earth Crying sand all the way He didn’t know where he was going, so he just kept walking All the places he wandered looking for Something to cheer him up Sand piled higher and the deserts were made With the sands of time, The hourglass empties Desert sure is dry You can’t get water From a stone Man wasn’t meant to be alone He walked to the edge, the very Edge of the world and There he found the maker He said, “I don’t know if you’re open for Suggestions or criticisms but this Stuff from my eyes burns like hell” Don’t get me wrong, I think you done Great with every little thing, but this Way of making sad just ain’t working Creator stepped up and said, hey thanks bud, I was kinda Worried about that when we laid it down, I was Hoping we’d never need to use it. First thing first, and with a Wave of his wand, the Sand in the man’s eye turned to salt water Second thing is - being Sad’s alright, but it would be pretty Soggy ‘round here, if it lasted forever Man needs a way to get Over stuff, to Drown his sorrows and move on Creator took a chunk of that man’s liver Made himself a bartender from it Bartender took out some highball glasses and poured the whiskey The three of them had a drink, sat down Talked about all that was troubling them, Creator said, don’t worry boys, this rounds on me With the sands of time, The hourglass empties Desert sure is dry You can’t get water From a stone Man wasn’t meant to be alone