Soundtrack for a Bike Ride

I was out in the yard one day 
I heard a sound coming up over the hill
It was that boomy kind of music that I don’t understand
I look out over the fence and see them when they crest the top of the hill  
It’s two young gentlemen pushing their bikes up over the hill
They got a phone or something strapped to the front of one of the bikes
It’s that boomy kind of music that I don’t understand
It’s their soundtrack for a bike ride
These young gentlemen have to be about fourteen years old
That is when the walk changes, you can always tell by the walk 
It’s a little bit like a duck, sort of that side to side thing 
They got to walk real slow for effect
They want to make sure we notice how tough they think they are
They are coming up over the hill with their boomy music
They are cussing and carrying on
They are pushing their bicycles up over the hill 
I got to thinking this is sort of a metaphor for what it’s like to be a young man
Here’s some stories and mythologies 
That explain what it is like to be a 14 year old boy
In case you have never been a 14 year old boy
 Its kind of like an 80’s action movie
 The main protagonist is always sitting in a pub or a cafe 
 He’s got a hamburger or something
 He’s all forlorn and lonely and there’s never any music playing at this point 
 The silence represents how quiet and serious this guy is 
 The waitress comes over and says, “you’ve got a phone call” 
 He goes up to the counter for his phone call, 
 On the other end is the bad guys 
 They got his girl, or his brother or something
 It’s bad, you can see it on his face
 So, he explodes out of that place 
 Just like those boys pushing their bikes
 He’s walking down the middle of the road
 You can tell that this guy will save the day or die trying.  
 Yippie Ki Yay my friends. 
 You know he’s the hero and he will live through this movie no matter what  
 You can tell by that walk  
 We walk down, we walk down, we walk down the street real slow
 This song is really about pirates
 The captains standing up there on the deck 
 He is looking down at his blood thirsty crew 
 Sure, that blood thirsty crew could mutiny 
 They could make him walk the plank, leave him on a deserted island 
 But he knows they won’t 
 It’s because he holds him in place with that look
 It’s that mean pirate look 
 He walks across the deck real slow 
 The wind blows through his beard 
 The whole thing is in slow motion 
 and he raises his sword over his heard and gives an arrrrrr 
 They give him an arrrr right back
 and there won’t be any mutiny on that day
 They know who is in charge 
 and it’s because
We walk down, we walk down, we walk down the street real slow
 I guess this is sort of about cowboys, 
 It’s not the high noon shoot out kind of thing 
 But more of the I just rode into town and I’m dirty and dangerous kind of thing
 It’s a look at me because I am one bad hombre kind of thing
 This guy rolls off his horse and he walks down the middle of the road 
 He gives a wink up to the saloon girls. 
 A tumble weed blows across there and Weoh weoh 
 its all in slow motion -  
 A hand comes out from a salon door and it’s got a shot of whiskey 
 He snags that glass, slams it back, and smashes the glass all without ever losing a step 
 Everybody knows there won’t be any trouble in town on that day
We walk down, we walk down, we walk down the street real slow
 I guess that’s what this song is about
 It’s about pirates and cowboys
 It’s about that swagger when you are fourteen years old
 It’s about how you turn every mundane situation into high drama in your own imagination 
 One day you are just as normal as you can be for a fourteen year old boy
 Then it changes
 Maybe you are in line at the cafeteria 
 The lunch lady scoops some mac and cheese onto your tray and there it goes 
 You turn around real slow
 You see that popular girl sitting at her table there with all her popular friends
 You know you don’t stand a chance with her 
 But for a split second you’re fairly certain she is on the verge of being kidnaped 
 By an evil syndicate of Kung fu masters
 And you’re pretty sure when she is kidnapped by an evil syndicate of Kung fu masters
 They are gonna call you up
 You gotta save the day Jack
 She’ll be so happy, she’ll give you a little kiss on the cheek
 Everybody will be so happy
 They will name you king of the popular kids
 Then you look over and you notice all the tough guys
 The jocks, the athletes, the guys on the team
 They always sit at the table next to the popular girls
 You see them and snap back to reality 
 There you are, standing there with your Mac and cheese and maybe a sloppy joe 
 You turn to walk back to your buddies in the other corner because that’s where you sit 
 Way over there
 You are still thinking about saving the world, you can’t help it
 While you’re walking  back there, you are walking real slow
We walk down, we walk down, we walk down the street real slow
 For most boys, after that point in time, it changes  
 It’s all delusions of grandeur 
 When you get to be about sixteen, you want a car and a girl
 So you learn to drive and you got to take care of the car
 You go get a job and a real life
 All that fantasy stuff about saving the world disappears
 It doesn’t matter how tough you are anymore 
 You got to pay the bills and that’s all there is to it
 For us creative musician types, it’s a little difficult
 We got a soundtrack going in our heads all the time
 You are taking out the trash and there is epic music playing in your head
 It can get a little confusing 
 Most of us go on and get a job and a real life and forget all those fantasies 
 But some of us become songwriters
 We grab a guitar and find a stage somewhere
 I am standing there on the side of the stage in the dark 
 and then the lights turn on and it’s all in slow motion now
 there’s a tumble weed blowing across the stage 
 I look out at the blood thirsty audience
 and the salt wind blows through my beard 
 and I raise my guitar over my head, 
 I give an arrr and start across that stage real slow
We walk down, we walk down, we walk down the street real slow
We walk down, we walk down, we walk down the street real slow